Touga's Diary
by Kinestra
Summary: Touga toys with yet another heart; this time it's Student Coucil member Miki...but who is toying with who?


Hello happy people! This is a happy disclaimer for those who might seek to sue me. I know these characters are not mine; I simply enjoy toying with them. ^^ I hope they enjoy it as much as I do, and I hope you do too.  
  
Entry 1  
  
I have begun to become bored with all my other lovers, and thus have started a search for a new toy. But is there a mind I haven't yet played with to my content? Perhaps....but where?.....  
  
"What are you doing, Touga-sampai?" Miki sits down and watches Touga type.  
Touga looks over and smiles, "Nothing much, Miki-kun. Would you do me a favor?"  
"What's that?"  
"Nothing much, I just want you to get me some Coke, ok?"  
Miki nods, and goes to the kitchen.  
  
Such a good boy he is. He's just so cute. I don't know why I never saw it before. It takes the End of the World to show you these kinds of things, I suppose. It seems I've found my new exploit for the time being. How refreshing that I didn't have to work hard for it....  
  
Miki returns with a glass of Coke, "Here, Touga-sampai."  
"Thank you, Miki-kun." Touga takes the glass.  
Miki nods and begins to leave.  
"Miki-kun?"  
"Yes?"  
"Come here a moment please."  
Miki returns to Touga's side, "Was there something else you wanted?"  
Touga chuckles softly, "There are plenty of things I want, but for now, just let me do one thing, will you?"  
"What's that?"  
Touga pulls Miki down gently and kisses him lightly.  
Miki jerks away, "Touga-sampai! What are you doing?"  
"I'm sorry, I should keep off of little boys," Touga suppresses a smile.  
Miki blinks, "What do you mean, Touga-sampai?"  
"Don't worry about it," Touga looks up, smiling innocently.  
Miki shakes his head. "There isn't anything else is there?"  
"No, you can go."  
Miki bows and walks off.  
  
And so, the game begins....  
  
Entry 2  
I only need for him to trust me enough to make him believe he needs me. This shouldn't be a hard task. I'm sure the event from yesterday has turned over and over in his head until he goes mad from thinking. He's been avoiding me all day though, which makes my task just a bit more difficult. If only I could get him to come near me again...  
  
Touga stops typing on the computer as he hears footsteps approach from behind. He waits silently for the person to make himself known.  
"Um...Touga-sampai..." Miki approaches carefully. "I was thinking about the other day....."  
Touga smiles to himself, he should have known.  
"What kind of conclusion have you come to?" Touga is careful to keep any hint of amusement out of his voice so that his tone is one that seems trustworthy.  
"Well, I...." Miki looks at the ground and blushes.  
Touga turns around, "Come here, Miki-kun"  
Miki looks up, and walks towards the waiting Touga slowly. Touga turns so that he is sitting sideways in his chair, and he watches as Miki walks forward hesitantly and kneels on the floor in front of the Student Council President.  
"Miki-kun," Touga slowly reaches out with one hand and brushes it past Miki's cheek to his blue hair. "I'm sure you've probably never thought of me as any thing other than the Student Council President...." Touga tries to make eye contact with Miki as he runs his fingers through Miki's well kept hair.  
"No...." Miki mutters, for the sake of filling the silence. His eyes are fixed on a spot on the floor.  
Touga smiles a bit, then puts his hand lightly under Miki's chin, "Why don't you look me in the eyes, Miki-kun?" He lifts the younger boy's face, and stares into Miki's blue eyes. "Are you afraid of what you'll find?"  
"Um...." Miki gulps. "What am I looking for, Touga-sampai?"  
Touga allows himself a small chuckle, "So innocent...." he rubs his thumb across Miki's lips a few times and draws his face closer.  
Miki stares into Touga's half-closed eyes, and his heart begins to race as his face is pulled closer to Touga's. His eyes grow wide as his lips touch Touga's softly, then pull away.  
A shuddering sigh escapes Miki, whether it's from relief or disappointment is impossible to tell.  
"Did you like that? Miki-kun?" Touga whispers.  
"I...I...." Miki turns his eyes away. "I don't know."  
Touga breathes into Miki's ear, "Would you like another taste?"  
Before waiting for a response, Touga places his mouth fully over Miki's. Touga smiles to himself as Miki leans into the kiss, closing his eyes.  
Touga pulls away, "I'm sorry, Miki-kun. That was...inappropriate."  
Miki opens his eyes and watches as Touga pulls away and removes his hand from under Miki's chin.  
"Touga...sampai..." an expression of troubled thought crosses Miki's face. "Why did I...."  
Touga smiles softly. "Perhaps.....you are holding in feelings, and you want to....express them."  
"Feelings?" Miki turns his head and looks at the ground, bringing a hand to his mouth, curling his fingers to meet his lips.  
"You're a very passionate person, aren't you?" Touga places his elbow on the desk and leans on his hand. "In your studies, in your duties to the Student Council, and maybe in love."  
"Love," Miki repeats the word in a low whisper.  
"Well," Touga sits up. "Maybe you should go for awhile, to think things over."  
Miki nods absently and stands up, then walks off slowly.  
Touga smiles to himself, and chuckles lightly, then turns back to the computer.  
  
It was unexpected of him to bring himself to me. But, now that I have asserted my position as trying to help him realize himself, he can be easily controlled. Of course there will have to be some reassertion of control every once in a while, but that will be more of a pleasure than something that only needs to be done.  
  
Entry 3  
  
A strange thing happened last night. I was sitting up reading by a small lamp, when I heard a sound from outside my bedroom door. Rather than alarm the intruder by getting up, I turned off my light and lay down, pretending to have gone to sleep. After a few minutes, someone crawled into the bed next to me, curling up to my side.  
"Who is it?" I asked quietly. (After all, it could be anyone. Whenever a strange person crawls into your bed, make sure you ask who it is.)  
A long silence preceded an answer, "Touga-sempai...you told me to go think...and I have been..."  
This surprised me, "Miki-kun? Why are you here? You have a test soon, shouldn't you be studying?"  
Another long silence, "I couldn't concentrate."  
"Then something must really be bothering you," I sat up and turned on the small lamp again.  
Miki sat up and leaned on my arm, letting out a sigh at the same time. I placed an arm around Miki's shoulders and kept him close.  
"I'm sorry to bother you this late," Miki whispered. "But I wanted someone to talk to, and....I wanted to know if you...."  
"'Wanted to know if I' what, Miki-kun?" By this time the situation had become rather intriguing.  
"If you...." more silence. "Actually cared about me."  
A small chuckle left my throat, "You really have been thinking, haven't you?"  
"Do you?" Miki looked up at me. The look in his eyes was so genuinely innocent and lost.  
"Of course I care about you, Miki-kun," I rested my head on his to reinforce what I'd said.  
"I think you're the only one that does...." Miki choked out. "Even more than my own sister....."  
I realized that he was crying then, the poor creature. But this was just the perfect opportunity.  
Taking Miki's face in my hand, I turned his face up to mine and kissed the tears that were trailing down his face. His face that was full of a torment that I had caused...or had I?  
Miki closed his eyes and tipped his face up further so that our lips met. I pulled away gently, but Miki had an expression on his face as if he feared he'd done something horribly wrong.  
Running a hand down the side of his face, I suggested we try something new. I held back a smile as Miki gulped, and nodded hesitantly. I kissed him again, closing my eyes to make him feel more comfortable. Waiting for a moment, I slipped my tongue between his lips.  
He gasped and pulled away, putting a hand to his mouth. Even though I'd expected this reaction, it was my turn to look hurt.  
"What's wrong, Miki-kun?"  
Miki looked back at me, his face held an assortment of emotions, ranging from surprise, to disgust, and uncertainty, plus a few others, that he tried to wipe away before I noticed.  
"I...wasn't expecting that...sorry," Miki managed to pick his words carefully.  
"No, I should be sorry," I lowered my gaze. "I don't know what came over me. Maybe you should go, hm?"  
"Yes...." Miki slid off the bed. "I'm sorry to have bothered you. Good night."  
With that, Miki slipped out of my room and was gone as quickly as he had come.  
  
Sometimes, it's worth letting your prey go once in the hopes of something better later. I'm just wondering if he thinks he's hurt my feelings. That would be entertaining, to have him apologize for something I've done to him. (Blink-blink, when did Seishirou get in this?)  
  
Entry 4  
  
Perhaps I've gone a bit too far this time. I didn't calculate well enough for this seduction, I'm afraid. But Miki hasn't given me much time, he's so unpredictable. I know why he does things, I just can't anticipate when he'll do something. A most distressing thought. Maybe, he's trying to control me? Is that possible?  
He doesn't make eye contact with me at Student Council meetings, even though he still times my speeches as always. Now the game of waiting begins. Who knows who will win out in the end?  
  
Touga lifts his fingers from the keyboard, "Do you always like to watch me write?"  
"I...I..." Miki fidgets with his fingers.  
"So, it is you," Touga turns and smiles. "What is it that you want?"  
Miki's eyes snap up and a look of hurt flashes there for only an instant, but an instant long enough so that Touga sensed it.  
"What's wrong, Miki-kun?" Touga frowns in concern.  
"I think you've been making...my life difficult. I can't concentrate anymore...." Miki collapses into the chair next to Touga and places his head in his hands. "I don't know what's wrong. Every time I close my eyes, every time I'm alone to think, even when I try to clear my mind by playing the piano......"  
Touga stares silent and solemn, waiting for Miki to finish saying what Touga already knows he's going to say.  
"I think about you," Miki's voice comes out nearly inaudible.  
"Miki-kun," Touga says in a low steady tone. "Are you in love with me?"  
Miki's head snaps up and he stares at Touga, eyes flicking over the others features. "Am I? If I was...would I know?"  
Touga stands and looks down at Miki, then gently takes the younger boy's hand in his own and pulls Miki up to a standing position. Touga's long fingers brush through Miki's hair a few times, then finally rest at the back of Miki's head. Miki closes his eyes as Touga pulls him into a drawn out kiss, letting Touga deepen it almost to the point of being uncomfortable. Miki revels at the sensation, returning it fully back on Touga.  
After the kiss, Touga slides his hand so that it rests under Miki's jaw, "Come see me tonight, Miki-kun."  
Miki nods then leans up and kisses Touga one more time before exiting the computer room.  
Touga watches with a amused smile as the door closes behind the blue haired boy. Sitting back at the computer, he poises his fingers above the keys.  
  
I suppose I was a fool to think he could ever control me.  
  
Entry 5  
  
As the circumstance was, I knew he would come. There was no way he could not have. I feel compelled to write the events of last night, as I have relayed every other detail of this endeavour up until now.  
He came later than I would have expected, and hovered outside my door for a few minutes. I kept reading, pretending I didn't know he was there. Soon enough, Miki pushed open my door slowly and looked in. I smiled and stood to welcome him in. Miki blushed and slowly approached me, then hugged me around the waist.  
With a smile, I hugged him back, "Miki-kun, You do realize you may be here for awhile, don't you?"  
Miki nodded, his head rubbing my chest. He continued nodding for a moment longer, perhaps because he liked the feel of my silk pajamas on his face.  
Taking his chin in my hand, I lifted his head up so that Miki's eyes met mine.  
"I do understand, Touga-sempai."  
I doubted that he did, but he would soon enough. I took his arms by the wrists and placed them around my neck, then leaned down and kissed him deeply. While dragging out the kiss, I slowly unfastened his Student Council jacket. Then, I placed one of my hands over one of Miki's small, soft hands, and pulled his hand down the side of my face. Breaking out of the kiss, I traced my lips down each of his fingers, then palm, until I reached the cuff of his jacket.  
The cuff between my teeth, Miki pulled his arm out of the sleeve, and I let it drop from my mouth. He quickly slid the rest of the jacket off and it fell in a pile on the floor. Miki's skin shivered slightly as I pulled him closer and into another kiss. The kiss ended quickly however as Miki's fingers sought out the buttons to my pajama shirt. His hands in mine, I led him down the front of the silk top, button by button, sliding the fabric off my shoulders, then my shirt, too, lay on the floor.  
I led him over to the bed, and lay him down. Miki leaned his head back so that I could kiss his neck, then his shoulders and down his lean torso, his skin quivering slightly at the touch. Miki's breath came shallow and staggered.  
He squirmed slightly as I unbuttoned his pants and slid them off slowly. When I looked up at Miki's face he was biting his lower lip nervously and staring vacantly off at something.  
He looked back at me when I brushed my hand past his face, "Touga- sempai I....uh...feel inadequately experienced."  
"Well, Miki-kun, how do you think you get experience?" I placed my index finger on his lower lip and pulled it from between his teeth. "You shouldn't do that."  
Miki smiled somewhat, "I know..."  
From that point on, he was much more relaxed, and took no mind to taking the rest of my clothes off. Miki gasped when I entered his body, then let out a soft moan. Being the intelligent boy he is, he soon caught on to the game and our bodies moved in rhythm on the soft bed.  
When I was spent, I laid down next to him and we both stayed in silence, listening to the other breathe heavily. After a few minutes, Miki curled up next to me and was soon asleep. I smiled and held him close until I fell asleep as well.  
It was luck that Nanami didn't wake up early like she usually does and come in to wake me. (Maybe for good reason...) Miki dressed quickly and without looking at me as I dressed at the same time. He almost left without saying anything, but I caught his arm and pulled him over to me.  
"You don't just leave without saying good-bye to someone who loves you, Miki-kun."  
Miki looked up at me with more shock than I'd expected.  
"What?" I chuckled. "Did you think I didn't care about you Miki-kun?"  
"I...I didn't know that you...you loved me."  
"Of course. Now," I gave him a quick kiss. "You should get going."  
He nodded and started out the door. Halfway out he stopped and turned, "Good bye, Touga-sempai."  
I smiled, "See you later."  
Miki smiled back, and left.  
  
One would think the game was done, but there is still keeping up an illusion while at the same time living in this world of harsh reality. Harsh...a gross over-statement. Could life be more fun?  
  
Entry 6  
  
It's been several days and Miki seems to be in high spirits, visiting me frequently during the night hours and staying until morning. Regretfully, I'm becoming bored with him, and soon I'll be back where I was to begin with. Perhaps, we need to push out of the comfort zone, and do something he won't expect...  
  
"Touga-sempai," Miki enters the computer room, and walks over to Touga, "I...brought you a lunch. I didn't think it would be good for you to not eat."  
"Of course not," Touga smiles and takes the carefully prepared tin.  
Miki begins to leave again.  
"Wait Miki-kun, come here."  
"But Touga-sempai..." Miki stands still. "I have to go to a piano lesson...."  
Touga stands up and ambles over to his little toy, and pulls him close, "It won't kill you to miss one lesson..."  
Before Miki can protest, Touga kisses him and closes his eyes to savour it. Miki struggles a little and Touga lets him go.  
"Touga-sempai! People can find us here!" Miki whispers harshly.  
Touga smiles, "You've been eating mints, haven't you?"  
"Well," a blush crosses Miki's face.  
"Were you expecting this then?" Touga pulls Miki close once more and begins to kiss the young boy's neck. "Perhaps, hoping for it?"  
Miki doesn't reply, only tilts his head back and lets out a soft sigh. Touga unfastens the rest of the jacket and slides it off.  
"What if somebody finds us?" Miki asks alarmed.  
Touga looks down at him, "Are you ashamed to admit that you have a relationship with me?"  
"I...no...its just that..." Miki struggles for words.  
"Are you afraid to admit to the fact we're lovers?" Touga pulls Miki closer and rests his mouth next to Miki's ear, and whispers. "I've touched you in ways that no one ever has, Miki-kun. You belong to me..."  
Miki whimpers slightly, "Touga-sempai...you're scaring me..."  
"Am I?" Touga nibbles lightly on Miki's ear. "There's something about your innocence that I find myself drawn to..."  
Touga straightens abruptly and looks down at Miki, who stares back nervously, "Wh-what's wrong?"  
"You're controlling me," Touga glares at the young boy. "And you're not even trying."  
Miki watches as Touga turns away disgustedly, and sits back at the computer. Looking around uncertainly for a few moments, Miki finally puts his jacket back on and quietly leaves the computer room.  
  
This would constitute a terminated relationship on my part. I can't do anything with him without feeling as if I can't control myself, and on these grounds I can't enjoy myself and I won't keep a relationship that I can't benefit from.  
It will put us...or rather him, in an awkward situation for a few days, but he'll get over it. They all do...forget me eventually... 


End file.
